Two kinds of missing: when there are 10 and one goes and where there are 2 and 1 goes

In Vedanta we have the example of the 10 friends who upon crossing a river try to check if all have crossed safely. The person counting forgets to count himself and they all end up ruing the loss of one friend in the waters.
The example is used to show how the Self can never really be experienced or understood as an object. For it's the very subject trying to look for the answer.
Note here that the friends lost someone, they know so. They don't know who but still mourn it.

But different is the experience when there are 2 and 1 is lost. For the loss is numbing than expressive. You express when there are others watching and you sub-consciously look for consolation.
But if there were only two and one is lost forever, there is no one else to express this to. It doesn't matter. Such loss is deeper. You go quiet.
Such vacuum either leads to freedom by realisation of the true self that knows no attachment. Or into a black hole that knows not how to handle this and takes the mind into depression.